The birth of Valentine’s Day just might surprise you. Furthermore, the origins of Valentine’s Day is rather murky.
However, the origin of Valentine’s Day is found in the ancient pagan culture of Rome and Greece. Having said this, February is always considered the month of romance and fertility. St. Valentine’s Day originates from two obscene Roman festivals of fertility called Lupercalia and Feast of Juno Februata both celebrated in mid-February.
How did Valentine’s Day start?
Valentine’s Day started in 500 A.D. Saint Gelasius, the third pope, of the Catholic Church started Valentine’s Day tradition. He named the day after Saint Valentine or Saint Valentinus. Valentine is derived from a Latin word ‘valens’ meaning worthy, strong or powerful.
A popular account of Saint Valentine of Rome tells us he was imprisoned and tortured for performing marriage ceremonies against the command of Emperor Claudius the second.
Valentine’s Day and Self-Worth
Sad, isn’t it, that our self-worth is tied up in Valentine’s Day. Young girls and young men determine their self-worth on whether or not they receive a Valentine’s Day card or not. Young men are apprehensive to offer love to the young girl they hope will be receptive to the affections they hope to bestow on her.
Furthermore, there is the stress of picking out the perfect Valentine’s Day gift. Giving the gift of love certainly is not easy. Because this day of love is so important, there is a lot of drama. She did not get the ring she was hoping for. He is turned down with the marriage proposal. Therefore, to me, Valentine’s Day is the most dreaded and scary day of the year. Fear of being hurt in love runs high.
As we mature, it still doesn’t get any easier for those who are single when this day rolls around. Plans are made for intimate dinners. Flowers are ordered. Gifts bought. Hearts are offered up. Many singles just hide out in their homes on this day, thus, avoiding the question, “What are your plans for Valentine’s Day?”
It’s not easy for those who are in relationships, but who are not in love with their partner. They love their partner, but they have settled into a relationship more like roommates than lovers. You’ve settled into a rut and are just going through the motions and you’re wondering how you got here.
Love the biggest fear of all
Do you know the difference between ‘loving’ someone and being ‘in love‘ with someone? There’s a difference? Yes, indeed there is! What happens if I ‘love’? What happens if I fall ‘in love’?
If I love, I give myself totally to love and then I’m lost forever. To let go and be totally in love scares me. I have loved and I do love, but I have never been in love. There’s a big difference between love and being in love. Why does it scare me…. to be in love?
When we love, we’re still in control of our emotions. But, to be in love, that is a different story. To be in love is to let go of self.
Falling in love
If you’ve ever had surgery, remember how you’re struggling to stay in control of yourself? Then the anesthesia sweeps through your veins and all control is lost. You have no idea what letting go of control has in store for you. It’s scary! Actually, it’s terrifying!
Think back to the Latin word ‘valens’. It means worthy, strong or powerful. I’m not sure I’m that strong or powerful enough to let go and be in love. Does this mean I’m afraid I may not be worthy?
How do you overcome the fear?
Honestly, I don’t know how to overcome the fear of being in love. Be brave and take a leap of faith! Easier said than done!
I guess to take that leap of faith is like jumping into the water for the first swim of the season. Days are warm, but the water hasn’t had time to warm up yet. You know the water will be cold when you jump in, however, you can’t contain your excitement and you jump. The cold water is a shock to your body! It takes your breath away!
The surprise of the cold water brought you out of your slumber. You’re fully awake to the pleasures and joy that the water brings as it engulfs you.
I think this might be what it’s like to be in love. There’s a disturbance when someone comes into your life, blindsides you… What just happened? Cold water was thrown in your face and your breath was taken away. Your heart is racing and you just don’t know what has happened. You’ve lost all control over your feelings!
In my upcoming book, Dimensional Shift, I talk about it’s easier to float downstream than it is to try to paddle upstream. I guess this is want it’s like to surrender to being in love.
So, to those brave souls who have surrendered to being in love, I tip my hat to you. You are truly strong, powerful and worthy. To let go of control is indeed brave. I have heard that being in love is a powerful experience.
